Dear Reader,

Statistics tell us now that roughly half of all marriages that occur in the U. S. will end in divorce. In this percentage is a significant number for whom this is not the first time they have gone through the pain and agony and stress of leaving a partner, and trying to do better the next time around. Have you ever wondered what God thinks about remarriage? Let’s see if we can find out.

First, we need to draw some guidelines. The first one is that we are talking about the individual who has been married prior to the consideration of the second marriage. The second guideline is that we are looking at two categories of those who are considering remarriage; those who have lost their spouse through death, and those who have lost their spouse through divorce, and that spouse is still living. Interestingly enough, God’s Word, the Bible, speaks to both of these situations. Let’s see what it says.

In the book of Romans, chapter 7, the Apostle Paul tells us in verse 2 that a woman whose husband dies is free to get married again. Other qualifications are of concern, and enter that picture, but when those qualifications are met, there is no moral or civil law against remarriage; the surviving spouse is free to do what he/she chooses. (See II Corinthians 6:14).

However, quite a different picture is presented in Romans 7, when we note that the first spouse is still living. In verse 3, Paul tells us that the woman who marries another man while the first man is still living, shall be called an adulteress. Try as we might, there is no way around the wording in this section of scripture. Jesus answered the question of those who asked Him about divorce in Matthew 19:3-9 by saying that whoever puts away his wife except for fornication, and marries another, commits adultery. Some may say that the word “fornication” gives license to divorce and remarry if the present spouse is found to be unfaithful, but a close look at that word, and an understanding of a Jewish wedding will clear up the misunderstanding. First, in the language of our day, fornication is known as premarital sex, which means that the action had to take place before the present wedding. Second, in Jewish custom, there was a one-year betrothal period, where the two persons seeking marriage were “on trial”, as it were. If, during that one-year period, the bride-to-be was found to be unfaithful, the groom-to-be could break the engagement, send the woman on her way, and then look for another woman who would be a suitable companion. Note, then, that this betrothal could be broken by a bill of divorcement. The marriage itself had not yet been consummated.

Going back to Matthew 19, Jesus quoted a verse from Genesis 2:24, when He spoke of the man leaving his father and mother, and cleaving to his wife. The word “cleave” indicates a weld, or strong glue joint. From our comments in the first part of this topic, I believe that death is the only force or power that can break that weld or joint in the eyes of God. Manmade laws and carnal or purely human desires are not of sufficient strength to make void, change, or nullify what God has recorded. In fact, in Matthew 19:6, Jesus also said, “…what God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (apart)”

In I Corinthians 6:9, Paul gives a list of those who will not inherit the kingdom of God. As you read through the list, note that in the English language, the words describing the persons indicate that they are still practicing the wicked deeds. In the list is the word “adulterers”, which tells me that in some cases, adultery is a lifestyle, not just a one-time thing. Either way you look at it, Jesus said that God did not intend for it to be that way.

You may ask, “Is there any hope for me, since I’m already remarried, with a former spouse still living?” My reply to that is, “Yes, there is hope, and there is forgiveness, but the repentant one also needs to stop the action causing the sin or problem. I know many things need to be taken into consideration; the most important is one’s relationship with God. I also know that it is easier to stay out of the problem, and not get remarried with a former spouse still living, than it is to correct the path after the event. When we do our best to walk with the Lord, we will discover that His grace is sufficient, no matter what we may go through.

Thanks for reading,
Pastor Ritchey